One of the great things about my job is that it lets me travel all over Mississippi.
After 20 years of windshield time, I have gathered a few observations about our driving habits. I offer these remarks purely as a public service. This is not meant to be critical. It is meant to shine a helpful little spotlight on a few issues that could use attention from Mississippi drivers. If any of this offends you, well, bless your heart — you may want to circle back and read it again.
First, let us discuss turn signals, also known as “blinkers,” and apparently known in some circles as “optional equipment.” This remarkable little lever sits on the left side of the steering column and allows you to announce, in advance, that you intend to turn or change lanes. Push it up if you are going right, down if you are going left. It is not complicated technology. It is not Bluetooth. It does not require an app. Other drivers cannot read your mind. Please use your turn signal. And for those of you who drive for miles with your turn signal blinking away like a casino sign in Biloxi, let me just say: I appreciate the effort. We’ll work on the follow-through later.
Next, we need to address the NASCAR mentality that seems to take over the minute some folks merge onto a Mississippi highway. Now, I like NASCAR. It still hasn’t been quite the same since we lost Dale Sr., but Highway 49 is not Talladega; I-55 is not Daytona, and nobody is handing out trophies at the red light in Canton.
Here is the situation: I am driving along and need to get over. There is room, but it would be tight, so being the considerate driver I am, I activate my turn signal — see above. What happens next? The driver in the next lane hits the gas and closes the gap to roughly the width of a church bulletin. Why? So you can be 20 feet ahead of me at the same red light? I am not taking your land. I just need one lane’s worth of mercy. Please let folks over. It will not cost you anything, and I promise we will all still get to the red light together.
Finally, we come to the issue that can test the patience of even the most sanctified among us: slow drivers in the left lane. You know who you are. Window down, elbow out, cruising along like time is unlimited and nobody behind you has a meeting, a doctor’s appointment, or a casserole in the oven. I have heard the explanation that the left lane is smoother. Fine. If it is smoother, then surely it is safe enough for you to go a little faster. And please do not get me started on the dreaded side-by-side formation — two vehicles rolling along at the exact same speed, turning the highway into a moving parade with no floats and no candy. I do not blame the person in the right lane. They are where they belong. But if you are in the left lane, kindly press the gas pedal or move over. There are people behind you with places to go and blood pressure medication that only works so hard.
Mississippi is a big, beautiful state with about 3 million residents. There is no reason we cannot travel our roads with a little more courtesy, a little more patience, and a little less “Days of Thunder.” So, when you drive, be considerate. Be courteous. Be safe.
